Tamara Out Loud

children Archive

Monday

4

April 2011

24

COMMENTS

Spring Break Match-Up

Written by , Posted in humor, life, Uncategorized

Spring Break: College Years Spring Break: Parenting Years Wrangle a hot, sweaty guy to help you apply your sunscreen. Wrangle a hot, sandy child who refuses your help with sunscreen. Wet t-shirt contest: No real losers, plenty potential regrets. Wet diaper contest: No real winners, plenty potential rematches. Eat junk all week; feel instantly fat, have no actual fat to show for it. Eat junk all week; feel instantly fat, have copious fat to show for it.    Get a new tattoo; your mom is mortified. Get a new tattoo; your tween is mortified. Return home too hungover to remember […]

Friday

14

January 2011

26

COMMENTS

When the World Breaks Your Heart

Written by , Posted in faith, life, Uncategorized

I think that tragedy shows us something about our hearts. This week, our family lost a dearly loved one. I grieved for my husband’s broken heart at the loss of his lifelong role model. I looked on as embraces turned to tears. I laughed at wonderful memories retold and cried at the sorrow they renewed. And I see that the hearts most filled with love bear the heaviest burdens. Last week, an ill person in Arizona targeted a politician, and 20 people were injured or killed in his rampage. Pointed fingers jabbed across party lines, and vitriolic voices screamed to […]

Tuesday

7

December 2010

17

COMMENTS

Dear Santa: A Parent’s Un-wish List

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Dear Santa, Some time in the next few days, you will receive a letter detailing an extensive list of wishes from my children. Before acting on it in any manner, please carefully consider my preemptive list of un-wishes: Moon Sand, Aqua Sand, and any other granular substances passing for playthings. I realize that at first pass it seems like a fantastic idea to give small children canisters full of colored sand for indoor use. However, once unleashed, very little of the sand is ever capable of returning to encasement, and it will leave in its wake a bevy of stained […]

Monday

25

October 2010

13

COMMENTS

We Sing Hope

Written by , Posted in faith, life, Uncategorized

I spoke with a couple of my friends at church yesterday, one who lost her mother and another who lost her pregnancy. I don’t know either of these pains, so I’m reluctant to try to touch them with clumsy hands. But I love these friends, and so I want to get close, even if I don’t know what to do when I get there. It’s been a few months since L. lost her mother, and it wasn’t at the forefront of my mind when I saw her. So I asked the casual, “How are you?”, not thinking. But L. is […]

Friday

24

September 2010

22

COMMENTS

Hell of a Day

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The cashier asked me how my day had been and I lied, “Good,” right to his face. I’m sure he gets it all the time. No one wants to say, “Well actually, since you asked, one of my kids has been struggling with her Reactive Airway Disease today, so I’ve pretty much had all 23 pounds of her lumped on my hip while I’ve tried failingly to chase after and assist her exuberant twin with her myriad toddler activities.” “I’ve loaded, unloaded, reloaded, and re-unloaded them in their carseats fully five times today so that I can drive to appointments, […]

Monday

30

August 2010

20

COMMENTS

Now Serving B*tches and *ssholes

Written by , Posted in humor, life, Uncategorized

I can’t say it any better than Anne Lamott:  “Toddlers can make you feel as if you have violated some archaic law in their personal Koran and you should die, infidel.” When you have twin toddlers, this is an especially frightening phenomenon. One furious small person is a struggle; a matching set of them is Game Over. My twins tend to work in sync, and most of the time this is ridiculously adorable. They nestle together with a baby bible between them, they move magnets on the fridge in graceful choreography, they coordinate their imaginary culinary efforts with a simple […]

Wednesday

28

July 2010

16

COMMENTS

Adventures in Vacation Bible School and Pole Dancing

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It all started with a simple email. My friend Stacey was rounding up volunteers for our church’s summer vacation bible school, and since my gaggle of children makes up an overwhelming percentage of the attendees, I felt compelled to put in some time. She asked me how I’d like to help, and this was my ever-so-eloquent reply: I’m fine with leading if it’s something I’m good at. So, like, no physical sports or teaching of important doctrine. I’m fine with music/drama. Maybe hospitality depending on how outgoing with adults that would require me to be; and maybe crafts if they […]

Tuesday

8

June 2010

18

COMMENTS

The Great Mom Divide: Are You a Newbie or a Veteran?

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There are all sorts of mothers, but I’ve noticed that you can generally divide us into two groups: newbies and veterans. It’s not just a matter of how long you’ve been a mom– one of my friends has a one-year old and a total veteran approach, and another has two school-aged kids and still acts like a newbie. Duration counts for something, but when it comes to determining if you’re a newbie or a veteran at heart, it’s mostly about attitude. Which side do you fall on? 1. Your baby is crying, so you_____. A. Abandon all other duties and […]

Friday

28

May 2010

1

COMMENTS

Milk Streams as Bubbles

Written by , Posted in life, poetry, Uncategorized

She watches, Intent, As last drops of milk Stream as bubbles To bottle’s floor. As she watches, I watch her, Admiring. She needs no distractions, No addictions. World’s simple wonders Are wonders Enough, And joy, Profound Through child’s eyes.

Monday

17

May 2010

5

COMMENTS

He’s Got the Star Wars Droids in His Hands

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I got to spend the morning with some of my church’s most wonderful people yesterday. They are so full of life and excitement, bubbling over with personality and laughter and joy. They live openly and in the moment, transparent and tender. They are wide-eyed students of God’s teaching and of His world, yet not a one of them has ever set foot in seminary. They are 4- to 8-year-old theologians, and on Sunday mornings, we get to show each other little glimpses of God. I knelt in front of the wiggly, giggling mass and began to lead them in singing, […]